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Garfield from The Matrix (1999)

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Artwork Showcase

thelasagnaisalie

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orangepill

Favorite Game

Garfield Kart

14.5

Hours played

Review 1

Review Showcase

Garfield Kart

14.5 Hours played

Rating: 10/10 – The best game I have ever played. Possibly the best thing humanity has ever created.

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🟧🟫🟫🟧🟫🟫🟧
🟧⬜⬛🟧⬛⬜🟧
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➖🟧🟨🟨🟨🟧

It’s difficult to know where to begin with Garfield Kart, because to describe it as a mere "game" feels reductive—like calling the Mona Lisa “a nice drawing” or referring to Beethoven’s Ninth as “a bit of a bop.” What we have here is not simply a racing title, but an unflinching, unapologetic exploration of desire, rivalry, and the spiritual consequences of competitive lasagna-based vehicular combat.

From the moment I selected Garfield—his smug, knowing expression pixelated in perfect clarity—I knew I was in for something special. The controls are tight, responsive, and slightly broken in exactly the way life is broken: unpredictably beautiful. Drifting through cardboard-cutout environments with spaghetti realism, I realized something rare: I wasn’t just playing a game. I was living a truth too pure for the mainstream gaming industry.

Let’s talk graphics. You could argue they’re outdated, but I disagree. What some call “primitive,” I call intentionally minimalistic. It’s a statement—a bold refusal to bend to the hyper-realistic, soulless textures of AAA conformity. When you see Odie’s car clip through a wall and explode, it’s not a bug. It’s a metaphor. Reality should break when Garfield is involved.

The item system? Divine. Lasagna as a boost power-up isn't just clever—it’s poetic. The baguette missiles? Dadaist genius. Every pickup is an act of rebellion against the sanitized power-ups of lesser kart racers. Here, chaos reigns, and it's delicious.

Narratively, the game chooses subtlety. There's no cutscene, no exposition, no hand-holding. But between the tire marks and lasagna stains, a story unfolds: Garfield versus the world. The eternal struggle of a cat who wants only peace, pasta, and to annihilate Nermal in broad daylight.

Sound design? Transcendent. The music loops like a mantra, hypnotic and pure, a sacred chant echoing from the Church of St. Paws. The engine noises are raw and tactile, like someone aggressively stirring risotto next to a dirt bike.

And replayability? Infinite. I have played over 600 hours. I dream in race tracks now. I instinctively try to drift around corners in real life. I got a speeding ticket last week and told the officer, “Sorry, I thought I was on Crazy Dunes.” He nodded in understanding. He, too, had played Garfield Kart.

In a world of broken promises, microtransactions, and soulless live-service titles, Garfield Kart asks nothing of you but belief. And in return, it gives you everything.