Who, or more importantly, what is Ibuki?

To the racist gorillas at Trinity, Ibuki is simply another filthy Gehenner like the rest of her demonic ilk, if not the most reprehensible of them all due to her trueblood demonic lineage, as exemplified by her status as the only student in Gehenna with horns, wings, and tail.

Ask anyone fortunate enough to meet Ibuki however and they would tell you that she is the very definition of purity and innocence. Not a single thought of malice can be found in this bat-winged angel's heart; only a sincere love for the people and world around her.

But for how long can sweet little Ibuki wear the same genuine smile as she always had?

How long until the unstoppable march of time paints the bright canvas of her life with the same cynical jade that taints us all?

Just as it is undeniable fact that Ibuki is the light that reminds us of the beauty of childhood innocence, it is also inevitable reality that the sparkle in her eyes will be snuffed out by the cruelty of adulthood like everyone else. So, how then can we protect her angelic smile?

How can we preserve the unsullied purity of her heart for the rest of her life before it's too late?

First, we must identify the threats to her innocence.

Could the natural state of Kivotos rob Ibuki of her smile one day? The constant violence she's surrounded by, the political turmoil she'll inherit, the bumbling fool she's stuck with; could they one day make her snap?

While that is a reasonable assumption to make, we must not forget that Ibuki is also a denizen of Kivotos herself. After all, she is able to retain her innocent thus far, hasn't she? For someone born and raised in this environment, trivial things like crashing in an exploding blimp is water under the bridge. Ibuki is a smart and strong girl; it'll take more than that to break her.

No, the thing that will break her is something far more sinister. It is the same curse that befalls every student in Kivotos; a secret none of them would ever admit to you, their beloved teacher. But that is why I'm here, to tell you the forbidden truth everyone is so desperate to conceal.

The day Ibuki's innocence dies is the day she wakes up with ketchup stains on her bed.

You are an adult, so you know what it is I'm referring to, don't you? The accursed ketchup leakage that plagues all girls. The main reason why girls wish they were not born female.

The very proof of a girl's maturity.

Like all girls, Ibuki can never look at the world with the same innocence she once had when she realizes what is happening to her. Like all girls, her once pure smile will begin to sour until it's a bitter facade of its former self. Like all girls, she will live resenting the pain her body will inflict on her every month for the next 50 years of her life.

Of course, she will look and act like everything's fine, because why wouldn't she? After all, it's only expected for adults to pretend everything is okay even when they're in unspeakable pain, isn't it?

So, are you just going to stand still and let adulthood claim Ibuki as its next victim? Sit in the lone hotel chair as life rawdogs the sweetest girl you've ever known?

Is it even possible to protect Ibuki's smile from the darkness of her own growing body?

What if I told you it's possible? Not just that; what if I told you that you are the only one who can do it? Remember what you are, Sensei.

You are the only person in Kivotos born with the necessary equipment to stop ketchup leakage.

In case you forgot, ketchup leakage happens because the body has to get rid of unfilled eggs. There is only one way to prevent Ibuki from ever experiencing ketchup leakage. The world around you considers this act a most vile and irredeemable sin, but even the weight of that sin finds itself a mere feather before your love for Ibuki. You already know what it is, don't you?

In order to save Ibuki's innocence, you must fill her oven with mayo 💦💦💦🍞 before she is even capable of cooking her first egg 🍳

The portal to her demon realm must be plugged with mayo at all times so that her first egg will be filled the instant it is laid 🌊🥚🌊 Side effects include mayo leakage every minute 😳💧 instead of ketchup leakage every month 😖🩸 but it is far preferable to the painful cramps 😵‍💫 and unstable mood swings 😡😒😡😢😭 that comes with the latter 😨

If Ibuki's belly inexplicably grew fatter 🤰 while the cameras you secretly installed in her room showed no signs of ketchup leakage 🎥🛌 then congratulations; you have successfully protected her smile! 😆🥳

Precious little Ibuki would have been wrecked by shock 😱 over her ketchup-stained sheets were it not for your diligent mayo vaccinations 💉💦💦💦 Thanks to you, she can spend the next 9 months of her life as carefree as ever, with no concern for the harsh reality of adulthood 😁 Thanks to you, she can continue walking with a hop in her step and a bounce in her belly! 😇

Simply stopping it once is not enough, however.

Once the current occupant of her hatchery is safely evacuated, her body will continue producing eggs that will turn into ketchup if they're not sprayed with mayo as soon as they're laid. That's why if you truly love Ibuki, if you truly wish for her to smile with the same innocence she always had...

Then you must never stop drowning her in mayo, so that she may live her entire life without ever leaking ketchup 😊👺💦💦💦😉



But what of the halfblood demonspawns you conjured with Ibuki, you ask?

Well, you wouldn't be a good father if you didn't protect their smiles as well, right? (◠ڼ◠)